Hard Pill to swallow

I had to write a very hard letter today. It was to an old family friend, who recently lost her daughter. The little girl was only 5 months old when she died. This is devastating as you may imagine, for a rather newlywed couple, both not even 30 yet.

The mother is questioning life, why we are here? Why are we born? Why do we exist in such a cruel world and she is looking for answers from me. Why from me, you may ask. Well, about 14 years ago, I went through a terrible ordeal. Without getting into too much detail, it involved a friend and I being kidnapped and spending a good few hours in the boot of a car. It was a horrid experience and my friend and I were blessed to escape with our lives. She wanted to know from me how do you forgive God after something like this happened to you. How do you keep on believing in Him and how do ever trust Him again. And my answer? You decide to. You make a decision, and you stick to it. That is how you do it. Only after you made this decision, can you carry on with life. Otherwise you end up bitter and twisted (for lack of a better description).

I do not believe God “punishes” us, or lets us down. I believe we live in a fallen world, with fallen people who decide to do terrible things to each other. I believe that we live in the Devil’s playground and that we need to pray for God’s protection every day. I did not pray for any protection that night or at any point in my life before that night. I thought I was fine living with one foot in the world and one foot in heaven. But that is not how it works. You cannot play in the Devil’s playing field and not expect to get hurt.

It is in the loneliest, saddest periods in our lives that we have the greatest encounters with a loving God. I do not know why this is, but when everything is going well, we often forget about Him and live as though we do not need Him. Only after we have suffered and decide to believe in Him again, can we truly say “Praise the Lord” and not use it as a “Christianese slogan”. Only then.